I’m pretty sure I know where the terms Kissing the Frog or The Frog Prince, originally, came from. They had nothing to do with a beautiful princess, who had magical lips and a heart full of true love, kissing a frog and releasing the prince from a spell. That’s a cliché. It’s a colorful and less slimy story that morphed from something gross, something far more sinister and, well, incestuous. And when I say gross, I mean grody to the max with a capital “E-W-W”.
I’m not even talking about a woman kissing a man (oops, frog, as the story goes) who thinks his tongue is a dagger and stabs her in the mouth over and over, until she reaches oral near-mutilation, sees double and believes he’s turned into a prince. It’s kind of like breaking a woman down with shock therapy. Although, that’s definitely more realistic, than the fairytale that grew from Disney’s version of telephone.
I’m not even referring to the even older Grimm version, where the spell was broken by the princess throwing the frog against the wall in disgust. Although, I would have preferred it if Tiana from The Princess and the Frog did that, so my daughter wouldn’t go around trying to kiss amphibians. Luckily, she only has plastic and stuffed frogs, no real ones.
I believe Kissing the Frog was born from the concept of mothers kissing their sons. And, when I say sons, I don’t mean their toddlers, I mean their grown and flown from the coop, middle-aged offspring. And, when I say kissing, I don’t mean on the cheek, forehead or anywhere X-rated (E-W-W, get your mind out of the gutter). I’m referring to mothers kissing their sons on the lips. And, I am not talking about a peck. There is “lingering” there. It’s not for only a second, it’s for a few…E-W-W.
After her son reaches adulthood, this type of mother continues to kiss her son on the lips (who has gone from tadpole to frog to prince). He’s a real gem. He’s a momma’s boy. He’s the perfect guy for a woman to settle down with, except he’s only perfect FOR HIS MOTHER. See what I mean about the capital E-W-W?
He’s the kind of guy that puts his mother ahead of his girlfriend, spouse or even daughter. He’s the kind of guy that lets his mother visit for longer than a week at a time or even lives with her. She’s the reason why MILs get a bad rap. She’s the one who visits and pretends that her DIL is not there or that she’s just a servant on the side. When she visits, she plays house and the DIL is, well, suddenly Cinderella.
This leads me to the question: when should men stop kissing their mothers on the lips (also applies to fathers and daughters)? If it’s a cultural thing, then how long does it take for it to reach “lingering”? Less than a second? A second? Five seconds? E-W-W…
Disclaimer: I am not referring to my MIL in this post. She is lovely and she doesn’t French kiss my husband. E-W-W…
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